Armed with barbs targeting everything from looks to age to Intelligence, you'll always be prepared with an appropriate-or completely inappropriate-putdown or comeback. Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth? My grandpa was working a sub shop at the register. Now that we have your attention, get our awesomely funny app from Apple App Store for free. #1 If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. 64. 63 Really Funny Star Wars Jokes The only way youâll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chickenâs ass and wait. Bored Panda has compiled a list for you of 30 most clever, witty and savage comebacks and insults … We are what we read, see and hear, which is why we’ve also listed down some of the best insults and good roasts coming from some hilarious characters from Brooklyn 99 to The Simpsons. I’m not here right now so cry me a river, build yourself a bridge, and GET OVER IT!!! Nov 18, 2017 - Explore Aj Danger's board "badass comebacks" on Pinterest. You must have a very low opinion of people if you think they are your equals. Below is a gallery of responses, retorts, and comebacks that are so witty that they’ve outlived the person who delivered them – enjoy this collection of history’s best insults: You’re so ugly, the only dates you get are on a calendar. Adults Find These 180+ Jokes For Kids To Be Freaking Hilarious, Best Riddles For Kids That Wonât Be Too Hard To Solve. I wasn’t born with enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel about you. Are you on the lookout for some funny insults and comebacks. I’m an acquired taste. Here are some cool examples of the same that are bound to make you break into a smile. I was today years old when I realized I didn’t like you. 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I have my away message on cause I don’t want to listen to you and your stupid nonsense. You fear success, but really have nothing to worry about. I don’t think you’re unintelligent. This list of funny insults and sarcastic comebacks will prepare you for your next battle! I look into your eyes and get the feeling someone else is driving. Funny insults you can use or prepared comebacks for people insulting you. Here are some of our favorite and most interesting put-downs of yesteryear. #2 The only way you’ll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken’s butt and wait. Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you? YOU CAN KISS MY ASS*. You’re so fat, you have to use a mattress as a maxi-pad. Oh my God, look at you. There are some stupid people in this world. FUN FACT: This is an old political clap-back from Pierre Trudeau, a Canadian politician when he heard that Richard Nixon insulted him. Even if you were twice as smart, you’d still be stupid! Dec 5, 2020 - Explore Mani Magic's board "savage insults", followed by 303 people on Pinterest. Iâve always wanted to meet your family. How to Generate a Comeback. You occasionally stumble over the truth, but you quickly pick yourself up and carry on as if nothing happened. YOU CAN KISS MY ASS. A sharp tongue is no indication of a keen mind. You get as much action as a nine button on a microwave. Just reminding u there is a very fine line between hobby and mental illness. Get it because it's faster than the guy who's running to pee. There’s nothing worse than being stuck for words only to kick yourself afterwards when you think of a good comeback far too late.. I am not anti-social. You’re so ugly you have to trick or treat over the phone. You so ugly when who were born the doctor threw you out the window and the window threw you back! I’m away live with it. Forty-five of history's funniest insults so witty and cutting that they've outlived the person who delivered them! Your head is so big you have to step into your shirts. 27 Best President Jokes 33 Funny Russian Jokes And Puns. We all sprang from apes, but you didn’t spring far enough. Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but you abuse the privilege. 20. My grandma was in line (theyâve kind of met a few times in passing before) and she gets up to the register and my grandfather (attempting to hit on her) says âHowâd you get through life looking so ugly?â And my grandma replies, âI donât know but youâve been doing it longer than I haveâ. Never let anyone talk down on you because you’re the boss! Fly like a butterfly sting like a bee I slept with yo mama now it burns when I pee. Teeth, but it would have called you first to start the,. Prepared comebacks for people insulting you if they have a life for.... All you friends now haven ’ t come back chocolate, it takes you an hour to cook minute.... Them in their rightful places while you enjoy being in your family,. 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